Tuesday, March 27, 2012


I hate potty training...like really really hate it. I have 2 down, one to go. Everyone said the girl would be the easiest. Apparently girls seem to "get it" sooner than boys, and she also has 2 slightly older brothers... so she, in fact, does do most things early in an attempt try keep up with them. But using the throne is not coming easily to my princess.

This morning when I was changing her pull up, she yelled "I have to pee!"  So we ran to the bathroom and placed her on the seat made for especially tiny butts and lo and behold..I heard the tinkle. She was quite surprised and said, "I CAN do it!". We cheered, we called daddy, and all of the grandparents. We celebrated with gummy bears...and we put on Minnie Mouse undies.
"Don't pee on Minnie, make sure you tell mommy and we will ruuuuun to the potty again!"

She nodded and looked at me with her huge brown, long lashed eyes solemnly. I dared to dream of being diaper free after four and 1/2 years. Could it be? I am really getting sick of pee and poop. Please let it be.

Fast forward 15 minutes..
"Mommy, I am peeing again". Sure enough..there was a little puddle forming on the carpet.  Ruuuuun to the bathroom. Too late, but we will keep trying.  On to Daisy Duck undies. Minnie gets tossed in the hamper.

"Mommy, I want Candy now."

"No, baby, the candy is for when your pee pee is in the potty".

She nods, I go make a second cup of coffee.

Return to the family room..

"Mommy, my pee pee is in the potty."

"No baby, you peed on Minnie...not in the potty. But it's ok, we will keep trying."

As I tell her this I hear the quiet rushing sound of the toilet right after it is flushed.

Walk into the bathroom...

Walk into her room and look in the hamper...

No Minnie.

"ummm, baby, where is Minnie?"

"In the potty."

"Did you flush Minnie down the potty".

Big solemn brown eyes again, nodding.

I guess she put her pee in the potty alright. 

Now where is my plunger?

Friday, March 23, 2012

how to scare men away

So you read about my rare but exceedingly wonderful date night 2 weeks ago.  But there is a part I left out. Well there are a few parts, but one in particular.
My husband and I popped into and Irish pub after dinner, but decided not to stay. Before we left, hubby had to run to the restroom.  I wandered aimlessly around the bar area, checked for texts from the babysitter, hummed to myself..until I heard a male voice, at very close range, say "Hello". I looked up to find a guy, much too metro for my taste anyway, leering at me. He even had an eyebrow raised, a la Flinn Ryder. 

"You know what?  You look like my second wife". he said.

This threw me for a loop...I didn't know where they guy was going with this. I was slightly innebriated after sharing a pitcher of Sangria with my husband, and was obviously a little dense.
"OK"....my clever response.

"Can I get you a drink?"...ok  here is where I caught on....he was hitting on me...and ooohhhhh, now I get it..he doesn't have a second wife..yet. UGH

"Nope, just waiting on my husband"..I pointed towards the restroom.

"He shouldn't leave you alone". 

Years ago I probably would have been thinking, " score, free drinks on this goofball." but I was having a nice night with my husband and really didn't want it marred by the middle aged man with a better manicure than mine, and eyebrows recently waxed.

"I'm a big girl,  I'll be fine." I told Mr. Smooth.

"You have a great smile..." he continued.

Really? Really! What part of my husband is in the bathroom did you miss? Because now you are just being obnoxious.

So I pulled out the big guns. Not profanity. Not pithy remarks about his looks or his character...nope...

Now what I am about to share is proven to deflect any unwanted male attention..I have also used it at the grocery store and the auto shop. It is as fool proof as Elle Woods "bend, and snap".

I looked him straight in the eye and said " I also have three small children at home".

He deflated before my eyes, and backed away with his hands in front of him in surrender.."ok, then" he mumbled.


Tuesday, March 20, 2012

too good and too true

Sometimes life seems so good it's a little scary...like I am waiting for the bottom to drop out. Not a good attitude to have, I know. But I am taking stock of my life right now and feel overly blessed. I am a mom of three kids who I adore. If we want to go to the zoo...we go to the zoo. If we decide to pack picnic lunches and spend the day at the beach...we pack a lunch and go to the beach. If we decide to stay in pajamas all day and eat cereal for lunch, we do.  We have the luxury to do what we want, together.

It wasn't always this easy. When the twins were little we were pretty much on house arrest. Preemies have underdeveloped immune systems and the exposure to every day illnesses can be devastating.We also had a heart monitor and oxygen tank to contend with. I had nightmares about being stuck on I95 behind an accident and the tank running low.

About the time I felt comfortable venturing out alone with the twins for more than a stroll (or one of our many, many Doctor's Appointments), I got the super surprise of being pregnant again.  Frankly, I was tired and suffered from all-day-long sickness, so venturing out with the boys, a diaper bag full of basic necessaties for the them, and the double stroller could be overwhelming as well as physically and mentally exhausting.
Nothing was ever "a quick trip" or "just run in".  Being in a hurry was never an option, and in fact only guaranteed that everything would take longer because I or the boys would get flustered. Adding a third baby to the mix made it nearly impossible to go anywhere with them alone. I had 2 one year olds and a newborn. It really wasn't feasible to think we could run to the grocery store or the park without it being a major production.

This fall the twins will be in pre-k five mornings a week. No more flexibility..no more acting on whims. No more waking up and saying "let's go see elephants today", or "let's build the tallest sand castle ever!" whenever we want. Nope, structure and a schedule that includes more than nap, meal  and bed time.

But for the next few months, we can enjoy all our days together doing pretty much whatever they feel like.  I am so lucky that my husband provides for us in a way that allows me to be home with these little ones while I can. I am blessed that the twins are healthy and smart and amazing, even after going through hell as newborns. I am blessed that my daughter is also healthy smart and amazing, and completes our family so perfectly.  My husband and I are happy and compliment each other. I am outgoing and talkative and impetuous..he is logical and laid back. I have a temper while he is on an even keel. I am unorganized and messy, he is constantly organizing something, either physically or in his head.  My head is usually in the clouds while he is grounded...so we make a good couple, and we parent well together.

I'm not saying my life is all rainbows and lollipops right now. I am usually tired and when one kid gets a cold, they all get a cold. There is a lot of whining in my house, and I am constantly filling something or wiping something. I vaccuum the same room three times some days, and meal time is like the witching hour four out of five times.

But I get to do all the fun things with my kids too. And having fun with them is the best fun there is.  I just wonder how long one person can be this happy, and that i can take all this happiness with me and hold onto it when life hits a valley, which it inevitably will. Right now I am just enjoying the ride. And the beach.

Sunday, March 11, 2012

the date night rule

My birthday is approaching, so my husband and I decided a much needed and long awaited date night should be on the agenda.
 Saturday night? check
All the kids are healthy? check
Babysitter? check
Rezzies at one of my favorite restaraunts? check

And off we went..perfumed, cologned and childless.

Dinner was excellent and completely unrushed. We had no crayons that needed to be repeatedly picked up off the floor. No juice was spilt. Never even a glance at a kids menu.  Appetizers, dinner, dessert and drinks...

The conversation was easy and fun and light. We laughed, a lot. We both think we are pretty funny. Especially with the infusion of red wine.

 You know how you always read that date nights are a must for tired parents with young children.  And that when you get away together, just the two of you, you shouldn't discuss the kids at all. You should discuss yourselves and reconnect as a couple, right?
When the (large) pitcher of sangria was delivered to the table with a wooden spoon, we laughed because we knew how much B would like to stir it. He loves to stir things right now. I don't know why, but he does.

Then when the loaves of warm cuban bread came, we discussed how much A loves bread. Or any carbs really. How he could probably eat half a loaf.

During dinner we discussed a myriad of things...work, our parents, plans for the summer, memories from our past and most often, our kids.

When dessert came, we both remarked on how much C would love the Flan, and how she would insist on eating all of it, even the strawberry garnish.

We walked down the cobblestone street in Old Town holding hands and laughing at the funny things our kids had said and done lately. How smart they are, how they are growing up and acting like little people instead of babies.

It was a great night.  We talked about everything, but the recurring theme, was, in fact, our kiddos. Of course we are going to think about and discuss our babies, even on a date. They are what make us happy. They are the crux of our lives right now. They are the main thing we bond over right now. We made these perfect little goofballs, so when we are celebrating our relationship on a date, how can we not celebrate our kids as well.

We certainly don't have time to have in depth conversations or enjoy memories for more than 2 minutes at a time when we are home with all three of them bouncing around us.  So when my husband and I have time to chill, to reconnect, to converse and just enjoy each other's company, I am pretty sure we will always laugh over, adore, discuss and admire our children. They are what makes "us" us.

Monday, March 5, 2012

love letter

You are always there when I want you. You are always open and warm and inviting.  You take me back any time of day or night, whenever I can find time for you. Though I long for you, I cannot devote the time I'd like to our companionship.
It is a struggle every time I leave you. Sometimes I want to cry, sometimes I want to yell "noooo, why must we part again? I swear I just got here". But priorities pull me away, again and again.
Please know that your love is not unrequited. I think of you often. How soft and conforming and comforting you are, how you always smell good, how you shape to me, how you cradle me. One day I will be able to commit to you. You won't have to be lonely, won't have to be abandoned at all hours of the night. But until my kids are older, my dear dear bed, we have to take what we can get. XOXOXOXO