Sunday, February 19, 2012

my wish

I hate it. I mean I really really hate it. Some people wish for a housekeeper, a yard man, or a really cute pool guy. I want a laundry fairy. I don't care if she is short or tall, thin or fat, beautiful or a hag, as long as the bitch can do laundry. And then put it all away. Because I will vaccuum my house and clean the toilets all day every day if I can avoid doing laundry. And it is never ending around here.

When the chuckleheads were little, it was endless little clothes and bibs covered in formula and spit up and poop from the up- the- back- blow-outs. As they are getting older it has progressed to various foods, dirt and sweat.

The twins are pretty average four year old boys. They play outside, they get dirty. But they can usually make it the entire day in the same outfit, unless one falls in a koi pond or something. But there are still two of them so that's a lot of little boy clothes, undies, pjs and socks.

C is a different story. She is lovely and girly, but rough and tumble too. She is also extremely messy. At any given time she is covered in dirt, glitter, cheese and/or chocolate. And if there is spaghetti sauce involved,  she wears it proudly. She goes through various outfits, and sometimes multiple pajamas a day. This is why she has so many hairbows..if the only thing left in her closet that is clean is a white least she has a cute hairbow in her mullet.

Gritty Daddy is great about doing laundry, and it's a good thing because he is the worst offender. Not because he is messy, but because he is OCD. If he wears anything for more than 15 minutes it must be washed. On an average day he dumps the following in our hamper:  his work clothes, his gym clothes and towel,and his "home from work and hanging out clothes".  Yes, usually three outfits a day. See, never ending laundry here.

I try to do my part to cut down on laundry. I wash my clothes only if they are: a) dirty or b) stinky. By dirty I mean visible spots. By stinky I mean smell that can't be covered with body mist.  OK, I'm kidding, kindof. But there are some days when I am feeling so efficient that I don't even change out of my pajamas until that night when I put clean ones on. Why dirty another outfit needlessly?  See, I am all about taking one for the team.

So if you meet a laundry fairy, please send her my way. She will be treated well and highly appreciated. I will even bake her a peach cobbler or vanilla bread pudding every day if she will spray n wash and fluff and fold.


  1. I'll be there on the next flight, but instead of the bread pudding, can you make it a margarita?

  2. absolutely,,but you cannot make fun of my mostly clean yoga ensemble.

  3. OMG! I am right there with you! I let that crap pile up and we will be pulling out our daily attire from the 'pile' of clean clothes! Why...have no clue. I just simply hate to take the time to fold & put it away. I despise dirty laundry.

  4. I completely son has your daughter's characteristics. He got to children's church late yesterday, missing their activity (finger painting), but still managed to leave the class with green paint on his butt and left leg? He wanted to stay in big church and listen to the music (read as dance and play air guitar). Shoooo....Happy Monday!

    1. FUNNY post! I feel the same way about the level of clean of my clothes and taking one (or seven) for the team by staying in my jammies. My daughters go through AT LEAST three outfits a day and my son can be just as bad. THEN they will try to leave for school with DIRTY clothes on their bodies! I am so ADD that I am incapable of even separating the clothes into piles anymore. I swear, I will start folding and piling and pretty soon they are back into one big maddening pile! if you find the laundry fairy, PLEASE send her my way...